Blackball

Paul Kaye

Cliff Starkey

Johnny Vegas

Trevor

James Cromwell

Ray Speight

Bernard Cribbins

Mutley

Alice Evans

Kerry

Vince Vaughn

Rick Schwartz

Imelda Staunton

Bridget

James Fleet

Alan the Pipe

Kenneth Cranham

Chairman Collins

Ian McNeice

Hugh The Sideburns

David Ryall

Giles Wilton

Terry Alderton

Bouncer Jonno

Meredith MacNeill

Suzi

Emma Amos

Local News Reporter

Paul Bentall

Gate Guard

Neil Conrich

Reporter Dave

Pamela Cundell

OAP

Josie D'Arby

Herself

Mark Dymond

Kyle Doohan

Mark Little

Mark Doohan

Rosie Ede

The Cleaner

Neil Finnighan

MTV Awards Stunt Guy

Christopher Godwin

Bowls Official

Howard Goorney

Reg Boyt

Ian Lindsay

Dull Referee

Angus Loughran

Himself

Nigel Lindsay

Targitex Chairman

David Schneider

Young Buck Reporter

Geoffrey McGivern

Brian Cronk

Felicity Montagu

Astronomy Professor

Jeff Rawle

Dennis

Vicki Pepperdine

Henna Haired PA

Stephen Noonan

The Advert Director

Ian O'Hara

The Lion Mascot

Beau Holmes

The Kangaroo Mascot

Julian Rivett

Journalist #1

Marlene Sidaway

Fifty-Year Old Lady

Tony Slattery

Flash Referee

Barry Woolgar

Journalist #2

Jess-Luisa Flynn

Secretary (uncredited)

Mel Smith

Bowls Commentator (voice)

Jon Snow

Himself

Matt Green